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$1 million for Zelensky's matching pajama budget. Designer pajamas. He arrived at the White House looking like he was coming for a sleepover in the Lincoln bedroom. I don't think so. $200,000 for Nancy Pelosi's boob job. Have you seen these dirty bomb bags? I would say these are weapons of war. They said, sir, a war on our eyes. It looks like a skeleton is holding two pumpkins. We don't know how she holds them up, frankly. $250 million to see if giraffes would have a threesome with an orangutan and a polyamorous genderqueer safari tour guide in Uganda. Uganda. Can you believe it? $100,000 a year to pay a night nurse to hold up Adam Schiff 's head while he sleeps so his neck does not snap in half. Pencil neck is taking your tax dollars. So sad. $30 million for a study to have a fish called the tasseled wobble-a-gum. The wobble-a-gum. To be on an all-vegan diet including oatmeal lattes and tofu-based chicken tikka masala in Baba Wawa, India. Nobody's heard of it. $170 million to feed the screaming tooth-bellied armadillo. The tooth-bellied armadillo. A 100% wagyu steak diet to see if they would go gay in Rama Rotuti Lakakaku Lapupa, Kenya. Nobody knows where that is. $175 million to see if the shuttle-nosed gutter fish would get an erection while watching a children's drag story hour While being fed a diet of cocaine, cool ranch Doritos and Colt. $45 million. The gunner fish. Think of that. $400 million for mani-pedis for illegal immigrants who identify as cats. Think of that. $15 million to fund a gays for Palestine protest in Gaza. They were likely thrown from a roof immediately before the drag show started. Gays for Palestine. Think of that. What is their slogan? From the river to the semen. This is really something. Thank you.